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+20 votes
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I'm sorry to hear that you're going through this challenging situation. It can be frustrating when you feel like the concerns you express are not being taken seriously or understood by adults. Here are a few possible reasons why some adults might react this way:

  1. Authority Bias: Some adults may automatically side with other adults or those in positions of authority, assuming that they are always right and that young people should defer to them. This bias can lead them to dismiss or invalidate your feelings and experiences.

  2. Lack of Perspective: Some adults might not fully understand or remember what it was like to be a teenager. They may underestimate the challenges and emotions you're facing, including dealing with a parent who acts immaturely.

  3. Denial or Avoidance: Facing the possibility that a parent is behaving inappropriately can be difficult for some adults, especially if they are close to your mom or don't want to confront the issue. They might avoid the topic altogether or deny the problem to maintain harmony.

  4. Narcissistic Traits: Unfortunately, some narcissistic individuals are skilled at manipulation and portraying themselves as victims. They may try to turn the situation around by making you appear like the problem, causing others to doubt your perspective.

  5. Communication and Expression: Sometimes, the way we communicate our concerns can influence how they are received. If you're feeling upset or angry, your message may not be coming across as clearly or effectively as you'd like.

Despite these challenges, it's essential to continue expressing yourself in a calm and assertive manner. Here are some tips to help you communicate your feelings more effectively:

  1. Choose the right time and place: Find a calm and private moment to talk to a trusted adult about your concerns. Avoid doing it in the heat of an argument or when emotions are running high.

  2. Use "I" statements: Focus on how you feel and your experiences rather than accusing or blaming your mom. This can help the other person see things from your perspective.

  3. Be specific: Provide concrete examples of your mom's behavior that concern you, so it's clear what you're talking about.

  4. Seek support from another adult: If one adult isn't listening, try talking to another trusted adult, like a teacher, counselor, or relative, who might be more understanding and receptive.

  5. Consider counseling: If you feel comfortable, you could suggest family counseling or individual counseling for yourself to work through the challenges you're facing.

Remember that everyone's experiences and perspectives are valid, including yours. Don't give up on seeking support and understanding from adults who can provide the help you need. If necessary, reach out to organizations that support young people or speak to a school counselor or teacher about your situation. They can advocate on your behalf and help you find the assistance you require.

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