+215 votes
in Narcissism by (6.3k points)
edited by

Your answer

Your name to display (optional):
Privacy: Your email address will only be used for sending these notifications.
+193 votes
by (5.9k points)

Yes, a narcissist can handle being in a secret relationship, and in some cases, they might even prefer it. Narcissists are known for their manipulative and secretive nature, and a hidden relationship can provide them with certain advantages that align with their personality traits and goals. Here are some reasons why a narcissist might be comfortable with a secret relationship:

  1. Power and Control: Keeping a relationship secret allows the narcissist to have complete control over the narrative and the dynamics of the relationship. They can choose when, where, and how to interact with their partner without the scrutiny or interference of others.

  2. Maintaining Multiple Relationships: Some narcissists engage in multiple relationships simultaneously, often seeking validation, admiration, and attention from different sources. A secret relationship can help them avoid detection and manage their multiple partners more easily.

  3. Protecting Their Image: Narcissists are highly concerned about their public image and how they are perceived by others. Being in a secret relationship enables them to keep up appearances, especially if they are already in a publicly acknowledged relationship or marriage.

  4. Avoiding Accountability: By keeping the relationship hidden, the narcissist can evade responsibility for their actions and avoid facing consequences for any harm they may cause their partner emotionally, financially, or otherwise.

  5. Hoovering Tactics: In some cases, a secret relationship can be part of a "hoovering" strategy. Hoovering refers to the manipulative tactics used by narcissists to draw their partner back into a relationship after a breakup. A secret rekindling of the relationship can be a way for the narcissist to regain control and keep their partner emotionally entangled.

It is crucial to understand that a secret relationship with a narcissist can be emotionally damaging and detrimental to the non-narcissistic partner. The secrecy, manipulation, and lack of genuine emotional connection can lead to feelings of confusion, frustration, and emotional distress. If you suspect you are in a secret relationship with a narcissistic individual or have concerns about a partner's behavior, it is essential to seek support from friends, family, or a mental health professional who can help you navigate the situation and protect your well-being.

Welcome to Mindwellnessforum where you can ask questions about reationships and mental health
...