Narcissists can exhibit complex and contradictory behavior in their relationships, and it's essential to remember that not all narcissists will behave the same way. The reasons why a narcissist might still want you even though they are with someone else can vary depending on the individual and their specific motivations. Here are some possible reasons:
Ego Boost and Narcissistic Supply: Narcissists thrive on admiration and validation from others, which is known as narcissistic supply. They may seek multiple sources of supply to feed their ego and maintain their self-esteem. Keeping you interested or involved with them, even if they are with someone else, can provide an additional boost to their self-worth.
Control and Manipulation: Narcissists are often driven by a need for control and power in their relationships. By keeping you interested or stringing you along, they may feel a sense of control over your emotions and actions, which can be gratifying for them.
Fear of Abandonment: Underneath their grandiose exterior, many narcissists have deep-seated insecurities and fears of abandonment. Having multiple options for romantic partners can help soothe these fears, ensuring they have someone to turn to if their current relationship fails.
Triangulation: Narcissists may use triangulation as a manipulative tactic. By maintaining a connection with you while they are with someone else, they can create a sense of competition and jealousy between you and their current partner, making you feel more invested in the relationship.
Lack of Empathy and Emotional Bonding: Narcissists often struggle with genuine emotional connections and empathy. They may not view their actions as hurtful or consider how their behavior impacts others, allowing them to maintain multiple relationships without feeling guilty.
Entitlement: Narcissists often have a sense of entitlement and believe they deserve special treatment and attention from others. They may not see any issue with being with someone else while also keeping you interested because they believe they deserve it.
Idealization and Devaluation: Narcissists tend to idealize their partners during the initial phases of a relationship. However, as time goes on, they may start to devalue their partners, seeking new sources of validation and excitement. This pattern can lead them to seek attention from multiple individuals simultaneously.
It's crucial to recognize that being involved with a narcissist can be emotionally damaging and unhealthy. If you find yourself in such a situation, it is advisable to prioritize your well-being and consider seeking support from friends, family, or a mental health professional. Establishing boundaries and distancing yourself from a narcissistic individual may be necessary to protect your emotional and mental health.