A covert narcissist, like any other narcissistic individual, may reject the former primary supply's attempts to work out the relationship due to several reasons, which are rooted in their personality traits and defense mechanisms. Here are some possible explanations:
Fear of exposure: Covert narcissists are often deeply insecure and fear being exposed or having their flaws and vulnerabilities revealed. By rejecting the former primary supply's attempts to work things out, they maintain a sense of control and prevent themselves from being seen as imperfect or flawed.
Maintaining superiority: Narcissists, whether overt or covert, have an excessive need for admiration and feeling superior to others. By rejecting the former primary supply, they reinforce a sense of superiority and control over the situation, which boosts their fragile self-esteem.
Lack of empathy: Narcissists have a limited capacity for empathy, and they may not genuinely understand or care about the emotional needs or desires of others. Their focus is primarily on themselves, which can lead to callous treatment of former partners.
Emotional manipulation: Covert narcissists may reject attempts to work out the relationship as a way to manipulate the former primary supply emotionally. By giving mixed signals or rejecting their partner, they can keep the person emotionally invested and under their control.
Devaluation and discard cycle: Narcissists often go through a cycle of idealizing their partners (love bombing), devaluing them, and eventually discarding them. Rejecting the former primary supply's attempts to reconcile might be part of this devaluation phase.
Seeking new sources of supply: Narcissists constantly seek validation and attention from others. When a former primary supply seeks to work things out, the narcissist might already be involved with or pursuing new sources of supply, making reconciliation less appealing to them.
Avoiding responsibility: Accepting attempts to work out the relationship would require the narcissist to take responsibility for their actions and behavior, which they are typically unwilling to do. Rejecting the former partner allows them to avoid accountability.
It's important to remember that dealing with a narcissist can be emotionally challenging and confusing. Their behavior is driven by deep-seated psychological issues, and they may not respond to reasoning or emotional appeals in the way a non-narcissistic individual would. If you are dealing with a narcissistic ex-partner, it's essential to prioritize your well-being and consider seeking support from friends, family, or a mental health professional who can provide guidance and help you navigate the situation.