When someone leaves a narcissistic son, the mother's reaction can vary based on her own personality traits, the dynamics within the family, and the degree of narcissism in both the son and the mother. Here are some possible reactions a narcissistic mother might have:
Blame-shifting: A narcissistic mother may refuse to accept any responsibility for her son's behavior or the reasons for the relationship ending. Instead, she may blame the person who left him, portraying them as the one at fault.
Manipulation and Guilt: Narcissistic mothers are often skilled at emotional manipulation. She might use guilt trips or emotional blackmail to try to get the person to return to her son or to make them feel bad for leaving in the first place.
Invalidation and Gaslighting: Narcissistic mothers might invalidate the person's feelings and experiences, making them doubt their decision to leave or suggesting that they are overreacting or imagining things.
Character Assassination: In an effort to protect her son's ego and self-image, the narcissistic mother may engage in character assassination, attempting to tarnish the reputation of the person who left her son.
Smear Campaigns: If the relationship ended publicly or within a social circle, the narcissistic mother may engage in a smear campaign to damage the person's reputation and paint them as the "bad" one.
Playing the Victim: Narcissistic mothers might play the victim card, portraying themselves as suffering mothers whose children have abandoned them, seeking sympathy and attention from others.
Hoovering: Hoovering is a term used to describe the tactic where a narcissist tries to suck the person back into the relationship. The narcissistic mother might attempt to contact the person, promising change or using any means to draw them back into her son's life.
Seeking Replacements: If the narcissistic mother perceives that the person who left her son was providing something she valued (e.g., attention, emotional support, etc.), she might start looking for a replacement to fulfill that role.
It is essential to remember that every person and situation is unique, and not all mothers of narcissistic sons will react in the same way. Dealing with a narcissistic mother can be challenging, and it is crucial for the person who left the narcissistic son to prioritize their own well-being and seek support from friends, family, or professionals if necessary. Setting boundaries and maintaining no-contact or low-contact strategies can be important for their emotional and mental health.