When the scapegoat leaves the narcissistic family system, it can lead to various outcomes and dynamics within the family. The scapegoat is often the family member who is unfairly blamed for the family's problems, made to feel inadequate, and is the target of emotional abuse or neglect. Their departure can trigger a series of changes within the family, including:
Family backlash: The narcissistic family may react negatively to the scapegoat's departure. The narcissistic parent or other family members may intensify their criticism or scapegoating tactics, trying to maintain the status quo and preserve their power and control over the remaining family members.
Shifting roles: With the scapegoat gone, other family members may be forced to take on new roles to fill the void. This can lead to changes in family dynamics and potentially cause conflict as roles are redistributed.
Change in family focus: The narcissistic family may redirect their attention to another family member or select a new scapegoat to take the place of the one who left. This can create a cycle of scapegoating and emotional abuse within the family.
Enabling behavior: Without the scapegoat to blame for the family's problems, the narcissistic family members may enable each other's dysfunctional behavior and avoid taking responsibility for their actions.
Guilt and remorse: Some family members may feel guilty or remorseful for their past treatment of the scapegoat and may experience inner conflict about their role in the family system.
Liberation for the scapegoat: Leaving the narcissistic family system can be a significant step towards healing and personal growth for the scapegoat. It allows them to break free from the cycle of abuse, gain independence, and establish healthier boundaries and relationships outside the family.
Grief and loss: Leaving the family, even if it was toxic, can still be a painful experience for the scapegoat. They may grieve the loss of the family they wished they had and come to terms with the reality of the family they had to leave behind.
It's important to note that every family is unique, and the specific outcomes may vary based on individual circumstances. In some cases, leaving the narcissistic family system can lead to positive changes and a healthier life for the scapegoat, while in others, it may take time to heal from the emotional wounds and establish new, healthier relationships outside the family. Seeking support from therapists or support groups specializing in narcissistic family dynamics can be beneficial for those who have experienced scapegoating and are trying to navigate life after leaving such a toxic environment.