While it's not an absolute rule that all narcissists will degrade the next person they are with, it is a common pattern in many cases. Narcissists often have a consistent behavioral pattern in their relationships, which includes idealization followed by devaluation.
During the idealization phase, narcissists can be charming, attentive, and seemingly perfect partners. They may shower the other person with affection, gifts, and compliments, making them feel special and valued. However, this phase is often short-lived.
As the relationship progresses and the initial excitement wears off, the devaluation phase begins. In this stage, the narcissist's true nature becomes more apparent. They may become critical, emotionally distant, manipulative, and even abusive. They might degrade, belittle, or devalue their partner, making them feel worthless and insignificant.
This devaluation can manifest in various ways, such as constant criticism, emotional manipulation, gaslighting, or even outright verbal and emotional abuse. The narcissist may project their own flaws onto their partner, blaming them for problems in the relationship and never taking responsibility for their actions.
The devaluation phase is where the partner's self-esteem and mental well-being can be significantly damaged. The narcissist's goal is to maintain control and power in the relationship, and demeaning their partner is one way they achieve this.
After the devaluation phase, the cycle may repeat, with the narcissist seeking out a new partner to idealize while leaving the previous partner emotionally scarred and broken.
It's important to note that while this pattern is common in many narcissistic relationships, every individual is different, and not all narcissists follow this exact cycle. However, it is crucial for those who have been in a relationship with a narcissist to recognize these patterns and seek support to heal and rebuild their self-esteem.