When the scapegoat of a narcissistic family decides to go "no contact" (cutting off or severely limiting contact with the family), it can have various effects on the family dynamics. However, it's essential to understand that each family is unique, and the outcomes may vary based on individual personalities and circumstances. Here are some possible scenarios:
Family Implosion: In some cases, the narcissistic family may experience a significant upheaval or implode when the scapegoat goes no contact. The scapegoat often plays a role in maintaining the dysfunctional dynamics within the family. With their absence, the family might experience increased conflict, blame-shifting, and a loss of the scapegoat as a convenient target for their issues.
Shifting Scapegoats: In the absence of the original scapegoat, the narcissistic family might choose a new family member as the replacement scapegoat. This new scapegoat could be another family member who was previously marginalized or someone who challenges the family's established norms and expectations.
Reinforcement of Enabler and Golden Child Roles: In some cases, the family members who enabled the narcissistic behavior or played the role of the "golden child" may reinforce these roles in the absence of the scapegoat. They might seek to maintain harmony with the narcissistic family member by aligning with their wishes and avoiding any behavior that could lead to being targeted as the new scapegoat.
Attempts to Reconnect: The narcissistic family might attempt to manipulate or guilt the scapegoat into reestablishing contact. They may use various tactics, such as love-bombing (overwhelming with affection) or gaslighting (invalidating the reasons for going no contact), to draw the scapegoat back into the family fold.
Closure and Healing for Scapegoat: Going no contact can be a vital step for the scapegoat's healing and self-preservation. It allows them to distance themselves from the toxic dynamics, gain perspective, and work on recovering from the emotional trauma they endured within the family.
Resistance and Ostracism: The narcissistic family may refuse to acknowledge their role in the scapegoat's decision to go no contact and instead vilify the scapegoat or label them as the one causing trouble.
It's important to note that the narcissistic family's response to the scapegoat going no contact may be multifaceted and complex. They may try different strategies to maintain the existing dysfunctional patterns or to adapt to the changing dynamics.
For the scapegoat, going no contact can be a challenging but necessary step toward healing and establishing healthier boundaries. In many cases, seeking support from a therapist or counselor who understands narcissistic dynamics and family issues can be beneficial during this process.