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When a narcissist's hoovering attempts are rejected, they are likely to respond in various ways, depending on the individual and the specific dynamics of the relationship. "Hoovering" refers to the narcissist's attempts to draw their previous partner back into a relationship or interaction after a period of discard or no contact. Here are some common reactions a narcissist may have when their hoovering is rejected:

  1. Anger and Aggression: Narcissists can become enraged when they don't get what they want. If you reject their hoovering attempts, they might lash out in anger, verbally attacking you, or attempting to demean and belittle you.

  2. Guilt-tripping and Manipulation: They may try to manipulate your emotions by playing the victim or using guilt-tripping tactics to make you feel responsible for their feelings or well-being.

  3. Love Bombing Redux: If their initial hoovering attempts don't work, they might intensify their love bombing tactics, attempting to overwhelm you with excessive praise, affection, or promises to change.

  4. Pity Plays: A narcissist might play on your empathy and compassion, pretending to be vulnerable or in distress, hoping to evoke sympathy and a desire to help or reconcile.

  5. Gaslighting: Narcissists may attempt to gaslight you by denying past abusive behaviors or distorting reality to make you doubt your decision to reject their hoovering.

  6. Silent Treatment: Alternatively, the narcissist might give you the silent treatment as a way to punish you for rejecting them, trying to elicit a reaction or make you feel ignored and unimportant.

  7. Sudden Indifference: In some cases, a narcissist might react with apparent indifference, acting as though they don't care about your rejection. This can be a ploy to regain control and make you question your decision.

  8. Stalking or Harassment: In extreme cases, a narcissist might resort to stalking, cyberbullying, or other forms of harassment in an effort to regain control or punish you for rejecting their hoovering.

Remember that narcissists are highly skilled manipulators, and their reactions may vary depending on their goals and strategies. It's crucial to prioritize your safety and well-being when dealing with a narcissist. If you find yourself entangled with a narcissist, consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor who can help you navigate the challenges and develop healthy coping strategies. Implementing strong boundaries and maintaining no contact with the narcissist can be essential steps towards breaking free from their toxic influence.

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