I'm sorry to hear about your difficult family situation. It's essential to prioritize your well-being and emotional health in such challenging times. While avoiding a funeral might be an option, it's important to carefully consider your decision and any potential long-term consequences.
Here are some steps to consider:
Self-care: Take care of your emotional well-being. Reach out to friends, support groups, or a therapist to talk about your feelings and get guidance on how to cope with the situation.
Assess your feelings: Reflect on why you want to avoid the funeral. Consider the impact attending or not attending may have on your emotional state.
Discuss with others: Talk to trusted friends or family members about your decision and get their perspectives. They may offer insights that you haven't considered.
Set boundaries: If you decide to attend, establish clear boundaries with your narcissistic sister. Keep interactions minimal and avoid engaging in discussions that may trigger negative emotions.
Plan an alternative memorial: If you feel that attending the funeral is not the best choice for you, consider planning your own private memorial or a separate gathering to honor the memory of your estranged parents in a way that feels comfortable and supportive for you.
Seek legal advice: Depending on the family dynamics and circumstances, consulting with a legal professional might be beneficial to understand your rights and responsibilities regarding the funeral arrangements.
Practice detachment: If you choose to attend, mentally prepare yourself for any potential unpleasant encounters. Remind yourself that you cannot control others' actions, but you can control how you respond to them.
Focus on closure: If there were unresolved issues with your parents, consider finding alternative ways to seek closure and make peace with the past.
Remember, it's entirely okay to prioritize your emotional well-being and protect yourself from toxic environments. Every person's situation is unique, so take your time to decide what feels right for you. If needed, seek guidance from a mental health professional to help you navigate through this challenging time.