There are several potential reasons why a narcissist might stay with the same partner for over 10 years:
Narcissistic Supply: Narcissists crave attention, admiration, and validation from others, known as narcissistic supply. If the partner continues to provide this supply, the narcissist may choose to stay in the relationship.
Control and Dominance: Narcissists often seek to control and dominate their partners emotionally, psychologically, and sometimes even financially. By staying in the relationship, they can maintain their sense of power and superiority over their partner.
Fear of Abandonment: Despite their grandiose exterior, narcissists can have deep-seated insecurities and fears of abandonment. Staying with a long-term partner provides them with a sense of stability and security, even if they do not genuinely value the partner's feelings.
Habit and Comfort: Over time, the relationship can become habitual, and the narcissist may be comfortable with the partner's familiar presence and routine.
Image Maintenance: Having a stable, long-term relationship can also contribute to the narcissist's image of being successful, lovable, or desirable, especially if they can present their relationship as ideal to others.
Fear of Exposure: If the partner has been subjected to the narcissist's manipulation and control for a long time, they might fear the consequences of leaving or speaking out against the narcissist.
Dependence and Isolation: Narcissists may isolate their partners from friends and family, making it difficult for them to leave or seek support from others.
Emotional Manipulation: Narcissists can be skilled emotional manipulators, using guilt, gaslighting, or other tactics to keep the partner engaged in the relationship.
It's essential to understand that each individual and relationship is unique, and not all narcissists behave the same way. Some narcissists might engage in multiple relationships over time, while others may remain in long-term partnerships. The reasons behind their actions can be complex and multifaceted.
Regardless of the reasons, being in a relationship with a narcissist can be emotionally harmful and emotionally draining. If you suspect you are in a relationship with a narcissist or are experiencing emotional abuse, consider seeking support from friends, family, or a mental health professional to help navigate the situation and make decisions that prioritize your well-being.