When a narcissist realizes they have lost someone forever, their reactions and behaviors can vary depending on their personality, coping mechanisms, and the nature of the relationship. Here are some possible ways narcissists might react:
Seeking New Sources of Narcissistic Supply: Narcissists constantly seek attention, admiration, and validation from others (narcissistic supply) to boost their fragile self-esteem. Once they know they've lost you, they may quickly move on to find new sources of supply to fill the void left by your absence.
Idealizing the Past: Some narcissists might engage in idealizing the past and reminiscing about the early stages of the relationship when things seemed perfect. This idealization could be an attempt to minimize the pain of losing you and to maintain an inflated view of themselves as the "perfect" partner.
Playing the Victim: Narcissists often avoid taking responsibility for their actions and may portray themselves as the victim in the situation. They may try to garner sympathy and support from others by painting you as the one who caused the relationship's demise.
Hoovering Attempts: "Hoovering" refers to attempts by a narcissist to suck their former partner back into the relationship. They might use various tactics, such as love bombing, promises of change, or emotional manipulation, to lure you back into their life and regain control over you.
Discard or Devaluation Phase: In some cases, if the narcissist feels they cannot regain control over you, they may resort to devaluation or discard you once again. This could be an attempt to assert power and dominance or to cope with feelings of rejection.
Moving On Quickly: Narcissists might move on to new relationships or pursuits swiftly, as they are often driven by a fear of being alone and the need for constant validation.
Isolating Themselves: In some cases, narcissists may withdraw and isolate themselves as a defense mechanism to protect themselves from further emotional pain or rejection.
It's crucial to recognize that dealing with a narcissist can be emotionally challenging and exhausting. If you've experienced a relationship with a narcissist and have decided to move on, it's essential to prioritize your well-being, set boundaries, and seek support from friends, family, or a therapist to navigate through the healing process successfully.