Narcissists act like it's nothing when they hurt you for several reasons, rooted in their personality traits and defense mechanisms:
Lack of Empathy: Narcissists often lack empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. They have difficulty recognizing or acknowledging the emotional impact of their actions on others because they are primarily focused on their own needs and desires.
Self-Centeredness: Narcissists have an exaggerated sense of self-importance and believe they are superior to others. As a result, they may not consider the feelings of others as significant or relevant, which leads them to dismiss the hurt they cause as inconsequential.
Emotional Manipulation: Narcissists can be skilled manipulators. By downplaying the hurt they've caused, they may attempt to gaslight or invalidate your feelings, making you doubt your perceptions and emotions.
Defense Mechanisms: To protect their fragile self-esteem and avoid feelings of shame or guilt, narcissists may resort to defense mechanisms like denial, rationalization, or projection. This allows them to disown responsibility for their hurtful actions and maintain a positive self-image.
Desire for Control: Narcissists often seek control and power in their relationships. Acknowledging the hurt they've caused could give you leverage and potentially diminish their control over you, so they downplay or ignore the impact of their behavior.
Need for Admiration: Narcissists crave admiration and approval from others. Admitting that they hurt you would require facing their flaws, which is difficult for them, as it goes against the image of perfection they want others to see.
Emotional Deficit: Some researchers suggest that narcissists may have deficits in emotional processing, making it harder for them to fully understand or connect with the emotions of others.
Overall, narcissists' behavior is rooted in their deep-seated personality traits and psychological mechanisms. It's crucial to recognize these patterns and protect yourself from emotional harm if you are dealing with a narcissistic individual. Seeking support from trusted friends, family, or a mental health professional can be beneficial in navigating these challenging relationships and maintaining your well-being.