People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) often experience intense and unstable emotions, which can lead to sudden and intense shifts in their self-perception and feelings about themselves. This pattern of thinking and feeling is often referred to as "splitting," where individuals may view themselves and others in black-and-white terms, oscillating between extremes of positive and negative evaluations.
Several factors contribute to these sudden feelings of worthlessness and undeservingness in individuals with BPD:
Emotional Dysregulation: People with BPD often struggle with emotional regulation, meaning they have difficulty managing and coping with their emotions effectively. This can lead to extreme emotional reactions to situations that might be perceived as relatively minor by others.
Fear of Abandonment: One of the core features of BPD is a pervasive fear of abandonment. When individuals with BPD perceive real or imagined signs of rejection or abandonment, they may experience a profound sense of worthlessness and self-loathing as they interpret these situations as evidence of their undesirability.
Identity Disturbance: Individuals with BPD may have a fragmented or unstable sense of self. This lack of a stable identity can lead to feelings of emptiness, confusion about one's values and goals, and a sense of not knowing who they are or what they deserve.
Negative Core Beliefs: People with BPD may hold deep-seated negative beliefs about themselves, often formed during childhood due to traumatic experiences, invalidation, or neglect. These negative core beliefs can surface during times of stress or perceived rejection, leading to feelings of worthlessness.
Cognitive Distortions: Cognitive distortions are thinking patterns that lead individuals to interpret situations in biased and negative ways. People with BPD may engage in cognitive distortions that reinforce their feelings of worthlessness and undeservingness, such as personalization (blaming themselves for everything) or emotional reasoning (believing their emotions reflect reality).
Interpersonal Sensitivity: People with BPD are often highly sensitive to interpersonal cues and may misinterpret neutral or ambiguous interactions as signs of rejection or disapproval. This can trigger feelings of worthlessness and inadequacy.
Relational Instability: BPD is associated with unstable and intense relationships. When conflicts or disruptions occur in their relationships, individuals with BPD may internalize the blame and feel unworthy of love and care.
It's crucial to recognize that individuals with BPD often struggle with intense emotional pain, and their experiences should be met with empathy and understanding. Effective treatment, such as dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) or other evidence-based therapies, can help individuals with BPD learn coping skills, challenge negative beliefs, and develop healthier ways of relating to themselves and others. If you or someone you know is experiencing these difficulties, consider seeking the support of a mental health professional.