When a person with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) does not answer your call, text, or any other form of communication, it could be due to various reasons, and it's not always necessarily because of something you did. BPD is characterized by intense emotions, difficulties in regulating emotions, and challenges in interpersonal relationships. As a result, their responses to communication and interactions with others can be influenced by several factors:
Emotional sensitivity: People with BPD often experience emotions more intensely than others. They may be more sensitive to perceived rejection or abandonment, leading them to react strongly to perceived slights or misunderstandings.
Fear of rejection and abandonment: Individuals with BPD may have an intense fear of being rejected or abandoned by others. This fear can be triggered by real or perceived actions, words, or even the lack of response from others.
Splitting: Splitting is a defense mechanism commonly associated with BPD, wherein individuals tend to see things as either all good or all bad, with no shades of gray. If they are upset or angry, they may have a tendency to see you as "bad" in that moment, which could lead to withdrawal or avoidance.
Emotional dysregulation: BPD often involves difficulties in regulating emotions. When faced with distressing emotions, individuals may cope by withdrawing and isolating themselves.
Cognitive distortions: People with BPD may have negative thought patterns that can distort their perceptions of events and interactions, leading them to misinterpret your intentions or actions.
Previous negative experiences: Past negative experiences or traumas may influence how a person with BPD interprets and responds to current situations.
It's important to remember that the reasons behind their behavior may not always be rational or directly related to your actions. BPD is a complex mental health condition, and the reactions of individuals with BPD can sometimes be unpredictable and intense.
If you suspect that someone with BPD is upset with you, it's essential to approach the situation with empathy and understanding. Give them space if they need it, but also express your willingness to talk and listen to their concerns when they are ready. However, it's crucial to prioritize your well-being and set appropriate boundaries in any relationship. Encouraging the person to seek professional help and therapy can also be beneficial for them in learning healthier coping strategies and improving their interpersonal skills.